


What Do You Do With a Drunken Democrat?

by kerlin



Category: The West Wing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-03
Updated: 2010-09-03
Packaged: 2017-10-11 10:37:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/111512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kerlin/pseuds/kerlin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Put him in the hold with the captain's daughter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Do You Do With a Drunken Democrat?

"You're drunk."

"I am, in fact, not all that..."

"Josh."

"There might have been more alcohol involved than I originally planned."

"Josh, you know..."

"Donna, if you say one more time that I have a delicate system, I swear..."

"What, are you afraid your reputation as a big, bad politican will suffer?"

"I am in no way afraid that my well-deserved reputation as a brilliant politician...I think I'm going to throw up."

"You have budget tomorrow morning at eight."

"Oh, God, Donna, please don't say either the words budget or morning when I'm in this condition."

"There will be Republicans there, Josh."

"Now you're just being cruel."

~*~

"Those cats are possessed."

"What? Josh, just drink the water."

"No, really, they're possessed. Little beady eyes and - that one, there."

"It's a kitten, Josh."

"I think it's Strom Thurmond. The spirit of an angry Republican is living in that innocent-looking kitten."

"The only spirit of a Republican affecting you right now is the one who drank you under the table tonight."

"Donna, I'll have you know, on the honor of the Democratic party, Congressman Skinner probably couldn't even have made it to his assistant's apartment."

"You say that like it's something you should be proud of."

"Little, beady, red eyes. It's possessed."

"Drink the water."

~*~

"Get away from me, evil creature!"

"Josh, what the hell is going on?"

"It was just about to start nibbling on my toes."

"It was not going to start nibbling on your toes. It's a perfectly well-fed kitten."

"Then it was going to start filibustering."

"Yes, clearly, the cat was going to start filibustering to prevent the passage of civil rights legislation."

"You never know."

"Go back to sleep, Josh. Budget and Republicans in five hours."

"I beg of you, woman, stop using those words."

"Sleep."

~*~

"You, Donnatella Moss, need a new couch."

"Oh? Is this your subtle way of telling me I'm getting a raise?"

"No, this is my not-so-subtle way of telling you that you need a new couch. My back hurts."

"I hardly think I should take all the blame for that. Which reminds me, Congressman Skinner called to leave a message and sounded just fine. He wanted to know how you were feeling."

"You didn't tell him, did you?"

"No, Josh, I didn't pass on information about your complete inability to hold liquor to the enemy."

"Good."

"He already knew."

"_Donna_!"


End file.
